Ok, admittedly, the title is dramatic. But I am just so tired of picking up pieces of so-called “indestructible” dog chew toys—whether that’s before the dog has eaten them or after—that I am tempted to give them nothing at all. Or at least nothing that isn’t edible. Dogs will eat anything, and frequently do, and I just don’t feel comfortable feeding them plastic. But these toys are cheap and plentiful and colorful—all attributes the human owners notice and about which the dogs couldn’t care less. Unfortunately certain dogs don’t seem smart enough to learn not to eat anything and everything so we must limit what they can put in their mouths: at least those things that humans have artificially created for their pets, for their owners, to clean up after they are obliterated, regurgitated, or expelled in one form or another.